That’s where I was ten years ago on 9/11.
We all have that date and time forever imprinted on our hearts and minds. I never felt quite right sharing my own version of “where were you” on 9/11 because honestly, my story paled in comparison to being there. In New York. In the Twin Towers. On those hijacked airplanes.
And yet it is significant isn’t it?
The moment we realized how vulnerable we truly are. How life can dramatically flip in an instant.
I was 28 years old, married just over a year, and a second year pediatric resident, finishing up my overnight shift in the ER. It was eerily quiet that morning when our social worker alerted us to the fact that a plane had crashed into one of the Twin Towers. We all gathered in one of the treatment rooms to watch it unfold on live TV.
Then…it happened…the unfathomable…a second plane into the other tower.
A collective gasp overtook us as we tried to wrap our brains around what we just saw.
And just like that, in that incredulous moment…the landscape of our world changed.
My thoughts were immediately of my husband who would be driving through downtown LA on his way to work and was likely unaware of what just happened.
After phoning him, I made my way back to our tiny studio. It was just a short walk across the street from the hospital where I worked. I should have gone home to sleep but could not. I was glued to the TV, wishing my husband was there with me.
Then my thoughts turned to the children.
The children of those parents inside the Twin Towers. The children watching these events unfold just as I was. The children living in New York, witnessing it all firsthand. The children of 9/11.
They are teens and young adults now and I wonder how it changed them? How did 9/11 shape their view of the world and how on earth did their parents take on the monumental emotional task of explaining the inexplicable?
Now, ten years later, I wonder how my own children will come to understand this tragic day in American history. One day we will sit down and talk about it. One day they will have questions about the planes, the innocent lives lost, and “what is a terrorist?” One day we will tell them where we were, how we felt, and how the world changed.
We will also tell them the incredible stories of hope and heroism. But for now, at ages 3 and 6, we will celebrate Patriot Day leaving the stark details for another time.
And if they ask, Mom where were you when it happened? I will simply say, in the quietest ER I have ever seen since that day, feeling utterly scared and helpless.
Where were you? Have you discussed 9/11 with your children?
I’ve often thought how strange it is, that my children won’t remember a difference because of 9/11. There is no pre-9/11 and post-9/11. It will just be the world they know. We’ve discussed 9/11 several times, because we have driven past memorial fields, full of flags for the victims of the day. But I imagine that there will be more conversations to come.
I am trying to remember at what age we started talking about the why’s and how’s of 9/11 with our kids. When it happened they were 2 and 4. I want to say the questions started maybe around age 7 or so. We were honest. But we are very ‘tell it like it is’ with our kids. 9/11 is still so ‘here and now’ so the questions come out just on regular days – not just after a history class the way some other events are.
I had been living in San Diego for 3 years and had been dating my now husband for only a week. Like you, my children are still too young to discuss what happened on 9/11. I remember that day like it was yesterday and will never forget it. Watching it on TV is nothing like it was for those who experienced it for real; but it still was scary.
I explained 9/11 to my boys, and they thought it was sad, but, for them, there has always been a 9/11. So hard to express everything that changed.
I was on a business trip in DC. A year earlier, I probably would have been at the Pentagon right where the plane crashed in since I was covering human-resource issues with the military. After that the issues I covered changed to, ironically, border control issues with Customs and INS. We were tied up in a meeting with our director, then ran out to an appointment with Customs, so we were oblivious to what was happening. I found out from the cab driver. This was after the second tower was hit! By the time we arrived to the Reagan Federal Building, the cab radio was relaying reports of a fire at the Pentagon. After getting out of the cab, we could clearly see the horrible smoke. Chaos ensued shortly thereafter as everyone ran around in a panic.
I flew home that Friday on the first nonstop that United flew nonstop from DC to LA. Crazy? No, I was desperate to get home.
I haven’t told my daughter anything, but she had an assembly at school were they talked about “bad things” that happened on 9/11. Now, my daughter had a hard time falling asleep tonight knowing that there is evil in the world. I still think she’s too young to know this.
10 years later and it still feels fresh. I wonder about those children who lost their parents and their innocence in a matter of minutes.
Were there new policies or trainings put in place in your ER as a result of 9/11?
It was interesting to watch some of the children on the ABC new special last night.